My lips are zip... but my heart always say something.

It's 2.37am Saturday morning. I was suppose to sleep a few hours back but i couldn't close my eyes. Came back from work a lil bit late today due to some extra work that need to be done. I make 30 to 40 call out today. Again there will be another Workshop organized by Shell.

I don't know what to say but deep in my heart i am sad. Feeling lonely... i hope my family is around. God why do i have to be here all alone? The time where i need someone to stay closed to me. What should i do... maybe its good to keep my mouth shut and swallow everything even though its hurts me for sure.

***** what i wrote above was on Saturday Night.********

Monday's has come... its 9.59pm now. I am tired and exhausted but i don't feel like i wanna sleep yet. Something bothered me on my mind. I feel Sad and Lonely but no one is here to talk to me. I wish mum is here........ After all the thing that i have been through.. the will always times that i need mum here. When i need something.. mum is there to listed to me. When i am sick.. mum is there to take care and when i feel bad.. mum is always there to comfort me.

But now i am all alone. I wish i just can disappear for good or just when to sleep till everything is completely gone. This is life.... live life to the fullest as if there is no tomorrow and once you make you decision.. you are going to live with it for the rest of your life.

I am not feeling so well..... and nobody is here... God help me.. Why do i have to be so sensitive! Grow up Kate!! Be Strong!!

~~~~>> the positive thoughts is always there....